I suppose it’s only natural to think “all” of our perspectives are “always” right. This has to be so, otherwise we would change our minds so we could then have the more correct point of view. This idea becomes interesting to me, especially when it concerns religion. Not all churches are on the same page theologically or doctrinally, so while we might disagree with certain churches, let me ask you: Would or wouldn’t it be better for people to attend the “wrong” church than to not attend church at all?
For example, your children might not attend the same church they did growing up under your roof, but wouldn't you rather they worshiped with a different church than not at all? How you respond to this question says a lot more about you than you might think.
So if we disagree with a certain denomination/non-denominational church, what happens in that congregation might be more beneficial for your loved one than you know. Your loved one attending the church you don’t approve of will more than likely be singing songs to God, hearing Godly messages, and reading Scriptures. They might even be praying for all we know? I’m guessing there might even be a sense of community they experience there too?
But, you say, they are “being led astray by a false doctrine!” And, that church does “it” wrong, whatever “it” is, you fill in the blank. Perhaps, or maybe not. Maybe they are reading their Bible for themselves for the first time in their life, and comparing the Bible with what they hear weekly or with what they’ve been taught all their lives.
Unless we are a cult leader, we should never be afraid of people searching for the truth on their own, without us, or without our help. Children and people we care for or mentor need to have an ownership of their faith. They need to be able to defend what they believe, not because of what we say or think or because of what “our church” stands for, but because of the conclusions they draw from their own study and worship.
Who are we to limit how the Spirit moves within any congregation, or in the lives of our loved ones? Just because we are uncomfortable with it, or it’s too liberal/too conservative, it might be just where God wants your loved one. There’s no telling what they bring to the table from your tradition that can help that other church, just like there’s no telling how that loved one can grow in a different setting.
Pray more than you pester. Scratch that, don’t pester at all, start to pray more. Ask nicer questions that show you are interested, instead of voicing harsh assumptions. Express your love more than your hatred or fears you’ve shared through the years. And, and this one is big, trust God more than you trust yourself to guide that other person you are so worried about.