On my bookshelf:

I recently lent out one of my favorite books on congregational life to a good friend here, and he was returned it last night.  As I was putting the book back just now, it occurred to me, many people in our churches are unaware of the value of Peter Steinke's writings.

I have a "trilogy" on understanding the emotional system from Peter Steinke that I highly recommend you pick up and read.  Each book is around 170 pages or less; quick reads that are very packed...  I'll save my favorite title for last, as I share these gems with you.

The 1st book to consider is, "How your church family works."  If you want to know why anxiety hijacks a group of people, and how to find stability again, you won't find a better resource anywhere.   One very powerful concept that Steinke draws out here is how we need to practice what he calls "self-differentaion."  This is the idea of being present with the group, but remaining an individual.  It's harder than you might think, but Steinke devlops the idea and provides clear guidance on the how to deal with it.

The 2nd book I'll recommend is, "Congregational leadership in anxious times."  You'll like the subtitle: Being calm and courageous no matter what....

Here Steinke unpacks concepts on how a leader can manage their own anxiety to be a non-anxious presence, to be a calming influence.  He does a great job describing the two types of anxiety we deal with, Acute and Chronic anxiety.  The book has three phases, The Leader's presence, The Leader's functioning, and The Leader's challenges.  This book is essential for anyone who would attempt to  navigate the choppy waters of congregational life...

The 3rd and favorite book of the three is, "Healthy Congregations."

Steinke shows how anxiety is like a virus attacking a body; it has to have a host to survive.  If you've heard the term "Triangulation" before, you'll benefit from Steinke's perspective on this topic.  The core of the book unpacks the four viruses that attack the body of the church: 1. Secrets, 2. accusations, 3. lies, and 4. triangulation.  Steinke shows how all four of these are expressions of anxiety.   This book is, no exaggeration, worth its weight in gold...

To say these three books should be required reading by all leaders, and most members, could come off as a cliche....  but I'll say it anyway :-)  Let me finish my recommendation with this:  All three books detail the really difficult challenges we face as a community of believers - followed by delivering  tools/skills that will aid us in our efforts to work through the many difficulties that face every congregation.  These books provide more than just hope for a better future for congregations strangled by conflict and stress... these books inspire their readers to action!

Click here for the printer-friendly version of the 3/15/09 outline

Lifegroup map 3/15/09  “Liquidation”  John 4:1-26

 

Please choose any One of the following Ice breakers:

(Everyone doesn’t have to answer the same one… pick the one you like!)

·        How much time each week do you spend on the internet?

·        How do you feel about your future tonight?

·        What is your favorite snack food?

 

Life exploration time:  Read out-loud John 4:1-26

Brief background: The Samaritans were racially mixed; partially gentiles and partially Israelites (See II Kings 17:24-41 for more details.).  They lived in a region that was between Jerusalem and Galilee.  The Jews and Samaritans were bitterly at odds—ethnically and religiously.  The Samaritans only accepted the 1^st 5 books of the Bible… The Jews destroyed the Samaritans’ temple in 120 BC.  Since most Jews traveling north & south between Jerusalem and Galilee bypassed the region of Samaria to avoid being ceremonially unclean, Jesus is breaking several social norms of His day in this passage…

 

~ What is the significance of Jesus being weary and thirsty? 

 

~ We know from piecing together the social customs of their day (and her history of relationships…) that the woman at the well is an outcast.  She is drawing her water alone, and in the heat of the day.  Recognizing this, along with living an immoral lifestyle (Going through at least 5 men, and she wasn’t married to her current man...) what type of encouragement should we personally take away from this story as we see how Jesus interacts with her?

 

~ Jesus says in 4:14 that the water He offers will never leave us thirsty…

·        How should we view and handle times when we are in “spiritually dry” times?

 

~ Reading 4:20-22 the woman raises a question of “where” worship takes place.  The only use of the word “salvation” in John’s Gospel is here in 4:22… but notice that Jesus says not only is worship on the Samaritan mountain not key, Jerusalem also is not central/indispensable… 

·        In what ways is Jesus liberating worship from structures or locations in Jn 4:21?

 

~ Jesus declares the nature or essence of God is Spirit in 4:24. 

·        How does this impact our understanding of worship, according to Jesus?

 

~ Jn 4:25 indicates that the Samaritan woman was expecting what type of Messiah? 

(Hint: she says when the Messiah comes, “he will explain/declare/tell us all things”)

 

~ Overall, Jesus masterfully uses dialogue to bridge the many divides between Himself and the Samaritan woman; all the while not condoning her lifestyle OR condemning her…

·        How can we apply Jesus’ example of dialogue in our lives today, to build relationships with people we differ with?

Click here for a printer-friendly outline for 3/8/09

Lifegroup map 3/8/09 “Wanting what Jesus wants” John 3:22-36

Please choose any One of the following Ice breakers:

(Everyone doesn’t have to answer the same one… pick the one you like!)

• What was it like the 1^st time you were away from your family?

• What is something you are thankful for tonight?

• Which is your favorite movie about Jesus, and why?

Life exploration time: Read out-loud John 3:22-36

~ See Jn 3:22. What is so significant about the amount of time Jesus spent with His disciples?

~ In what ways are we selling ourselves short today, if/when we only spend the bare-minimal amount of time with other believers?

~ In Jn 3:23 we see that the water was plentiful. How does this help increase an understanding that baptism implies fully submerging an individual?

~ In Jn 3:30 John the Baptist admirably wants to reduce his public role (personal influence/attention) and he wants to turn people towards Jesus… Expanding that notion to modern-day Christianity:

How can we authentically point people to Jesus and avoid attracting people to our particular perspectives/preferences?

(i.e., Introducing people to Jesus and getting out of their way)

~ Jn 3:34 teaches that God gives the Spirit without measure/limit. What exactly does that mean?

~ Read Jn 3:36 in another version other than the NIV here... John indicates that obedience is at least equally essential for our salvation as belief. What does obedience consist of in this verse?

Personal reflection time:

How much control of my life am I really giving over to Jesus?

click here for a printer friendly version of the 3/1/09 outline

Lifegroup map 3/1/09  “When God loves”  John 3:16-21

 

Please choose any One of the following Ice breakers:

(Everyone doesn’t have to answer the same one… pick the one you like!)

·        If you went to Winterfest last week, what was your favorite part?

·        What do you want to be remembered for, after you die?

·        How do you personally deal with doubt?

 

 

Life exploration time:  Read out-loud John 3:16-21

 

~ Why do you suppose Jn 3:16 is so popular?

 

~ Describe how Jn 3:16 summarizes the Gospel…

 

~ Why might someone have a struggle with the idea of God loving everyone in the world?

 

~ According to Jn 3:17, God didn’t send Jesus to condemn/judge the world, but to save the world.  How do we reconcile this, with the fact that God still keeps us accountable for our choices?

 

~ 3:18 touches on what type of faith or belief?

 

~ In Jn 3:19-20, subversive, secretive, behind-the-scenes behaviors are chastised.  Whose job is it to expose these “dark” behaviors for what they are?

 

~ Read Jn 3:21.  Why is it so liberating when we are vulnerable and “come clean”?

Click here for a printable outline for 2/22/09

Lifegroup map 2/22/09 “Night-vision” John 3:1-15

Please choose any One of the following Ice breakers:

(Everyone doesn’t have to answer the same one… pick the one you like!)

• What is your favorite season of the year?

• When was the last time you were in your hometown?

• What’s the 1^st thing you do when you get home from a long trip?

Life exploration time: Read out-loud John 3:1-15

~ (Assuming Nicodemus is actually sincere in 3:2 and he’s not being sarcastic with his “we know” statement) Why is Nicodemus convinced that Jesus is an authentic teacher?

~ What do you make of Nicodemus coming to see Jesus at night?

~ Where else in John’s Gospel (other than here in 3:3 & 3:5) does Jesus use the term “Kingdom”?

[Hint, there’s only one other time John records Jesus as saying “Kingdom”]

~ When would Nicodemus have had an opportunity to hear Jesus teach, AND,

How much could Nicodemus have been expected to know about Baptism at this point in time?

~ As a Pharisee (and probably a member of the Sanhedrin) Nicodemus would’ve had to have been an expert in the Bible and a decent & morally upright man.

Assuming he did know his Scriptures and he was a moral teacher and leader:

Why isn’t that level of morality & depth of Scriptural understanding enough to make Nicodemus righteous in Jesus’ eyes; since he is told that he would still need to experience a “rebirth” in 3:7?

(BTW: This also goes for whoever else is with him; since the pronoun “you” is in a plural form here, it means Jesus is talking to more than just Nicodemus…)

~ In JN 3:5-8, what role does the Spirit play in our rebirth?

~ Looking at Jn 3:13-15, shed light on how these two truths both function together in our salvation experience:

(1.) What God does, along with,

(2.) Our personal faith.

Personal reflection

Who should I invite to Lifegroups this week?

Click here for a printable outline for 2/15/09

Lifegroup map 2/15/09 “When push comes to shove” John 2:18-25

Please choose any of the following Ice breakers:

(Everyone doesn’t have to answer the same one… pick the one you like!)

• If you have ever helped save a life before, what was it like?

• What was your most terrifying experience ever?

• Fill in the blank, “I’m most looking forward to ___________________....”

Life exploration time: Read out-loud John 2:18-25

~ What is the core/foundational/primary challenge they are blasting Jesus with in Jn 2:18?

~ (Recognizing that their questioning of Jesus in Jn 2:18 is right on the tail-end of Jesus driving out the multitudes of “man & beast” in Jn 2:15)…

What are a few of the emotional and/or adrenaline-fueled challenges Jesus might’ve had to personally bring under control, before He was ready to respond to the Jews?

~ How do you personally calm anxiety-type feelings during a confrontation?

~ What is your greatest struggle/fear while facing a probable confrontation?

~ Often times, when faced with a potential confrontation we revert to the “Fight or Flight” style of reaction. Now being armed with Jesus’ example of facing confrontation from tonight’s passage: What are some better habits we could/should adapt than fight/fight in our dealings with people?

~ Read out-loud Jn 2:23-25. There’s a neat wordplay here; it’s on the Greek word for “Faith” that gets translated here, once as “believed in” (from the people who’d observed His signs) and then it’s translated as “entrust” (on Jesus’ part toward them). In other words, the people believed in/trusted Jesus — He didn’t believe in/trust in them.

BTW: The people that Jesus didn’t entrust Himself to, were new believers in Him… (So, these aren’t His antagonists He’s withholding trust from...)

Personal reflection time:

What level of trust is Jesus able to place in me?

Click here for printable outline for 2/8/09

Lifegroup map 2/8/09 “Get out of God’s way” John 2:13-17

Please choose any of the following Ice breakers:

(Everyone doesn’t have to answer the same one… pick one you like!)

• What was the highlight of your week?

• How have MP3 players and Ipods changed your household?

• What’s your reaction when you step in used-gum in a parking lot?

Life exploration time: Read out-loud John 2:13-17

Brief background:

Folks traveling into Jerusalem to observe the Passover feast (Jn 2:13) were required to exchange their “common” money for “temple” currency to be allowed to make any vows or contributions to Temple treasury. Also, to offer an animal sacrifice they could only offer animals the priests considered 100% perfect; without spot or blemish. Since it could be difficult for a weary traveler to produce an acceptable animal, “pure” animals could purchased at the Temple grounds.

History reveals the currency exchange and animal sales were both offered at over inflated prices… Both the attitudes and the corrupt practices of the Temple officials, who tended these affairs, presented sizable hurdles for people who genuinely wanted to Worship God… Our passage seems to indicate Jesus was confronting these “excepted” attitudes of insensitivity and corruption.

~ How were the people in JN 2:14 guilty of dishonoring God and making it more difficult for people to simply worship God?

~ Keeping in mind that the practices described in JN 2:14 were fully acceptable by the standards of their day… What would your personal reaction to Jesus have been if you were with Him (Either as His disciple or simply an onlooker) while He was weaving a whip and then using it??

~ How could Jesus’ response (Jn 2:15-18) be an example for Christians to emulate today?

~ In what ways is it possible that Christians today could be unintentionally making it more difficult for “outsiders” to connect with God?

Personal reflection:

How will I remove barriers and help other people see God more clearly this week?