Saturday, November 1, 2025

Why we’re unhappy & how to cure it

 

You probably think I’ll attribute our unhappiness to our fear of missing out, but it’s beyond FOMO and beyond our biases on what is and isn’t fair.  We carry sorrows over seeing the successes of others, it’s almost as if we are addicted to other people’s dopamine.  More than likely you’re unhappy if you compare your empty bucket to someone else’s.  You only have room for one or the other, you’ll either carry jealousy in your bucket or joy, but not both.  

Most people naturally long for an easier life, but in the absence of earning a good sense of accomplishment we feel empty inside, and then we feel bitterness towards the people we assume are holding us back.  Carrying other people’s rocks feels like a burden compared to carrying the same load to build your dreams into reality, that’s plain commonsense.   What we overlook is this, happiness is an only at best a byproduct of satisfaction.  
The more we worry about anyone else's life or how easy they have it, the more focused we are other people, the less headspace we have for ourselves.  Hard work is therapeutic and beyond the benefits of physical labor, working on yourself is the hardest.  

Don’t confuse unhappiness with depression.  Depression isn’t just the absence of happiness, there’s a darkness lurking in the void, it’s not an empty emotion, the depression is a tangible sensation of an unbearable weight that suffocates you.  Unhappiness is even worse than sadness and depression, unhappiness is despair over the inability to experience the simple joys of this life.  

There is no finish line in this journey we call life, we’re born, and one day we die, but will you truly live your life during the in-between of the inevitable?  The biggest lie we tell ourselves is, “one day” as in one day the kids will be grown, the bills will be caught up, the dream will manifest itself or magically materialize “one day.”  We act like life is about sitting in a cosmic train depot holding out hope the right train will stop and let us on board, all the while we ignore the ticket booth.  We neglect to read the schedule.  The universe passes us by…

We forfeit today by waiting on tomorrow.  You only have today, yesterday is long gone and who knows what tomorrow will bring, so pick up your bucket, gather your load of rocks and stones, conquer the chaos and walk up the hill victorious leaving the emptiness of victimhood behind.