Thursday, October 20, 2011

It's been about 6 months since I've blogged.  A lot has gone on in our lives since I've transitioned out of the NE church.  The Lord blessed our family with a great summer together.  If you've followed any of our FB or Twitter posts, you know we hit the beach, went to D.C. for a couple of days, relaxed, Klay and I drove to AR and visited Drew & Laura once, and every week we've grilled a lot, a lot.  Want to hear something funny?  About two years ago I asked the church for a Sabbatical, at the time I didn't get it, so I'm thanking God for the sabbatical I did get this year...

Life has felt disoriented over the last several months, as you might expect.  Not working, moving, trying to find our way, wondering what God is teaching us in all of this, you name it.  Many good friends, from near & far, have come along side us in our pain and have offered much needed encouragement.  I've had a lot of heartfelt phone calls from friends out of state, and several meals with good friends in town.  I'm looking at life differently than I did one year ago, even six months ago.  Many blessings have given us glimmers of hope, and we've seen God's hand in weird ways we wouldn't have normally thought about, too.  Some people have distanced themselves, while other people have drawn closer.  I don't really expect anyone to understand how we feel, but it's true, you do find out who your real friends are.

I'm back to working concrete for the time being.  With the economy still limping along and the weather turning, well you can figure that one out.  I'm thankful for a job and hope for the best.  Nervous?  Somewhat.  It's a little bit surreal, working construction after about a 17 year break from it...

In many ways, after the experiences of the last few years, my adrenal glands and my sanity needed a breather.  So I'm thankful for the past few months.  Now, I'm looking around and I feel kind of like Mel Gibson's character in the Road Warrior after his wreak, mixed with Tom Hank's character in Cast Away.  I'm not sure where I am in the plot of Cast Away right now, I'm certainly past the plane crash, but I don't know if I'm past the scene where he knocks out his tooth with the ice-skate, or if he's back in civilization already?  I think I'm learning about myself, that's always a good thing.  I know my prayers have changed, and I appreciate the small things more.  I don't take a lot for granted these days.  I miss my old life, sometimes, but I don't want to go back, not one little bit.

Why haven't I blogged?  Honestly, my mind pretty much shut down over the last few months.  I lost a lot of creativity.  Well, let me rephrase that, I haven't felt creative.  My mind, emotionally & intellectually kind of went into hibernation.  This year, the rhythmic centering I usually experience preparing lessons, sermons, articles, etc. has all been shifted.   I'm just now lately feeling like I have a voice, or have something worthwhile to say, or an interest to write.    My mind has felt starved.  My spirit felt flat.  Now, I'm feeling the tingling sensation bears certainly must feel when it's time to wake up and feed themselves.  It's almost midnight here, my alarm clock is set for 5:55 a.m., and I probably should be in bed now.   

No comments: