Wednesday, May 8, 2013

They hate Mother's Day...?

This Sunday is one of the biggest days of the year because we do get to honor mothers.
Not everyone is as excited though..., we hear more & more about the people who cringe as Mother's Day rolls around.  There's a blog post that's gone viral this week.  The blogger writes an "open letter" as "non-mom" and it's a plea, and a tongue-in-cheek warning. Many people whom I deeply respect are all gaga about this open letter.  But I'm baffled at the positive response people are giving it.  Click here to read the blog: "an-open-letter-to-pastors-a-non-mom-speaks-about-mothers-day"
I've read this open letter blog post over several times.  She threatens to take her toys and go home if the pastor asks the moms to stand  (she said she might just walk out of church if the pastor asks the moms to all stand)?  This is hard for me to comprehend. There are people though, who get downright upset over Mother's Day, or at least the way we celebrate it in church.  Some people are practically protesting Mother's Day, insisting preachers tone down their Mother's Day message?

Motherhood is like an Olympic sport, and just as Mom climbs the platform to receive her Gold medal, we're told there are people who were disqualified from competing, so...?  I guess fairly soon people will write to Hallmark, raising the fact that seeing Mother's Day cards in the grocery store is painful?

Motherhood is so lofty & virtuous it deserves our fullest respect.  To respect & honor moms is not an attempt to remind people left wounded by motherhood of the pain they feel, it's focused on celebrating the ideal -- and there's the rub.  When we as a culture celebrate Mother's Day, this isn't an insult to anyone -- Mother's Day isn't a time that people are "rubbing it in your face" because of whatever misfortune you've suffered from.  It's a wonderful time to show our appreciation to the most influential people in our lives.

To cease the fuller celebration of Mother's Day, is the logical equivalent of subduing the joy one family holds as their child is baptized, because it reminds another family of their prodigal.  This isn't a slippery-slope philosophy  it simply comparing a closely related example.

There are different levels of pain we feel at Mother's Day.
I imagine the first few Mother's days, after a mother passes away, are bittersweet.
Not unbearable, but certainly painful, yet as you reminisce, perhaps you can still smile?
You look back fondly at memories from childhood, and you miss your mom.  Thankfully, those who have had mothers who have passed away don't seem to resent Mother's Day.

Sadly, not all moms stick around, and then again, some who stuck around maybe should've split...  I don't know what it feels like to miscarry or to not be able to conceive, but I can also see how this Sunday is a very painful reminder of the void many women must feel.  There are moms who failed their families and there are those who would love to start families and become mothers but can't -- and the pain is too great to allow them to fully celebrate Mother's Day.  I respect that, but still, we should want to stand up for the many-more healthy experiences too.

There are people who have legitimate issues with motherhood, but I think most often this disdain for Mother's Day is a lot like the people who have a hard time with Christmas music playing in the shopping malls or the school Christmas pageant.  Does this mean we don't publicly want to celebrate wedding anniversaries as much, because too many people have divorced or choose to remain single these days?

I hope I don't come off as insensitive,  but I'm not sure why the rest of society is always expected to give into the exception?  I find it offensive that so many people are jumping on the Hush-Mother's Day bandwagon.  I'm sorry if Mother's Day is a sad reminder of the deepest pain in your life -- I hope you can find it in your heart to extend grace this Sunday.


Jenny said...

Personally, I like the holiday, although I have some idea of the kind of pain it can cause others. What disgusts me is how, among the Churches of Christ, secular holidays like Mother's Day get so much attention from the preacher on Sunday morning while everyone tiptoes around religious holidays.

Craig Cottongim said...

I hear you -- kind of like how everyone is gone on Easter... Thanks for your feedback!