We will thrive when

We live in strange times.  Though I imagine every generation thinks theirs is special, ours seems unique.  With all that’s going on these days, what could be missing?

Not long ago scientists discovered a tiny lizard, a chameleon, the size of an ant.  I can now browse the internet and “cast” a movie from my phone straight to my television, without using any wires.  Certain laws protect the speech of hate-mongers, but as we recently observed, instead of confronting racism our culture politicizes it without really improving the situation.  Meanwhile, across the pacific ocean there’s a dictator ruling a slim peninsula of land who is threatening our nation with nuclear destruction, but no one here seems to have a good way to handle him.  And earlier this week, millions of “eclipse tourists” traveled to watch the sun disappear in the middle of the day while a handful of others predicted these astronomical events were ushering in the Apocalypse.  

What’s going on?  With all of our advances and discoveries, life should be improving both in quality and satisfaction -- instead it seems like while we have more opportunities, we express less optimism.  We have so much potential, yet we seem fearful of the future.  

Perhaps too many people are living for “today” with no thought for tomorrow.   We live in the present, which in a sense is healthy, but being obsessed with the present isn’t.  Lately, we’ve attempted to rewrite our history in many circles while we’ve forgotten about our future in others.  

With all of the uncertainty that accompanies our global turmoil and the craziness that captures our nation as well, how are we supposed to move forward and keep our heads on straight?  It comes down to perspective.  It rests in being firmly rooted.  It depends on being anchored to something solid.    

I know you’re expecting me to say something about how we sharpen and perfect our perspective by focusing more on God.  While that’s true, the context in which God most often nurtures our lives is through family.   It’s not impossible, but it can be harder to stay devoted to God when we are disconnected from our families.  

Spiritually speaking, there seems to be a symbiotic relationship between how we understand/experience God and how we function as a family.  Honor your father and mother is in the same paragraph as don’t take the Lord’s name in vain.  God never said He hated divorced people, but He said He hated divorce because of its negative impact on the spiritual development of children (see Malachi 2:13-16).

Without being too simplistic, our fractured family structure is probably to blame for many if not most of our current woes.  Our culture experiences too much crime and when we’re not dealing with crime, it struggles with welfare concerns; these are easily traced to a breakdown in the home.  

There’s probably nothing more detrimental to our development than an absentee-father.  We can’t blame this poor estate of the modern family on a lack of education, we have more access to learning than at any other time in human history.  So is the church to blame?  

We are, by and large, products of our families.  Family can be messy, they can embarrass us, they can drain us, and they can wound us like no one else can.  Family also can be one of the greatest blessings this life has to offer.  

When was the last time you went to a family reunion?  When was the last time you enjoyed any inter-generational activity with family?  A meal with family members of different ages, or even a game night?  Family reminds us of where we have come from, what’s truly important today, and why our future is so special it deserves to be protected.

Does this mean that if I have the perfect family, my life will be perfect?  No.  But common sense tells us when we are more secure in our home we are more confident out in the world around us.  Perhaps, the best gift you can give your children might not be a good college education or a new car, it just might be the example you set for them on how you treat each other.   

If you have a healthy family, thank the good Lord above regularly and take some time to share your love and experience with those less fortunate.  If your family isn’t all it could be, pray for your family and purposefully spend more time with godly families who can help yours grow.  Families only thrive when family is a priority.  

What we need to unlearn from 2016 in order to overcome inequality & division in America

I am basically frustrated to the point where I will soon have to pare-down my social-media news feed.  Maybe you can empathize.  The problem is, 2016 made it socially acceptable to post divisiveness and be combative while we hide behind our keyboards.  Did our verbal attacks solve much, or have we made matters worse?  You tell me.

Currently we have a culture of victims who demonize the people they disagree with, or feel oppressed by.  Everyone is the enemy and everything offends us.  From Corporate America, the Feds, Wall Street, religion, our history, to politics or the school system, it's like there's a cosmic conspiracy against humanity, that is, if you listen to the news or spend much time on social media.

And, the way we discuss our very real distinctions are dividing us culturally even further.
Rich vs poor
Educated vs uneducated
Blue collar vs White collar
Straight vs Gay
Men vs Women
White vs all ethnicites
Deplorables vs Losers...
Left vs Right
Green Energy vs Fossil Fuels
Vegetarians vs Omnivores
The list really seems endless....

Am I missing something, aren't we all humans?  Don't we all share the same DNA?  Don't we all want the world to be a better place?

From Black lives matters, to Blue lives matters, to Islamophobia, homophobia, White Privilege, and to boycotting the Oscars, we've become a nation of protesters.  The problem with protesting is that it puts everyone on the defense, and when we are defensive we build walls, emotionally and otherwise.
Your message, no matter how accurate or well thought out, will never penetrate a closed mind. 

Here's an example.  Does a movie like Hidden Figures, which is about minority women who helped the space program during the Civil Rights era, does it help or hurt our our Nation's divisions?  If that questions offends you, you might be part of the problem.  It's a fair question.  I see no harm in it.

My point? How the movie is promoted, portrayed, and discussed will be what makes all the difference.  It boils down to agendas.  You are either part of the solution, or you will continue the problem, and I'm not sure how much longer we as a nation can afford to perpetuate our divisions.

In our home, from an early age, we discouraged our boys (from preschool age) to leave out the skin color of other people they told us about.  For example, when we went over their day at the dinner-table, as they recounted an experience with a classmate, if our children said, "You know, the black kid?" we would, as parents, correct them and say, "You don't tell us when another kid is white when you are telling us a story about your day, do you?  See, there's no need to say someone is black either.  We are all the same."

I share that part of our household to say, a major preliminary step to overcoming our differences and to healing what divides us is to eliminate "us vs them" from our thinking, and our vocabulary.  Highlighting or spotlighting what makes us different from each other has the potential to exasperate the divide.

Does this mean we turn a blind eye to the inequality and differences in our nation?  No.  Well, what can we do then?  We move from protesting, to participating in creating something better.  

We need to recognize some people do not want to cooperate or change, and we need to marginalize their influence.  Don't waste your time & energy on ignorant people.  You will not change them with any tactic, the more attention we give them, the more credibility they gain...  It's hard enough to change yourself and to make self-improvements, it's impossible to change other people against their will.

We have ugly, mean-spirited, prejudiced people we will have to deal with.  But there's hope, because there's nothing stopping us from collaborating with people from all backgrounds who want to work towards peace and unity.

We have hate-mongers and toxic people out there.  But we can make progress when we contain the vitriol/venomous hate-speech ourselves..., and refuse to be vindictive or seek retribution.

We can make a difference, we can be better when we cease to see ourselves though a victimized past and begin to look towards a victorious future that overcomes hate & division.  How you see yourself and others does matter.  Let's make 2017 a year where we forget what we look like on the outside and where we all do a better job at looking at what counts.